A valuable lesson

Today I attended a very valuable lesson. One that has opened my thoughts and feelings that have lingered in my heart for the past week.

In the class, I was shown this:

"THE MOST IMPORTANT ELEMENT IN CHILD REARING"

What is the foremost foundation of child-rearing?
It is to convey the parents' love to the child.
Parents' love grows the child.
Without love, the large potential in human beings cannot grow.

It is said that the planting of sad feelings could stem from any of the 3 stages: as a fetus in the womb, at birth or between the ages of 0-3 years.
A way to cure this is with a mother's apology to the child for the specific negative thought that was implanted.
Even at 3 months, the negative thoughts of a pregnant woman about her unborn child, would cause her fetus to start rejecting all information. This would lead to a child with poor memory or even one with learning disabilities.
Such negative thoughts plant sadness in the fetus' heart, which resolve in repeated nightly crying episodes as a child.

As I look upon myself, I see truth and possibilities in the conclusion above.

Most mothers, even me myself, think that they love their children enough. However, most children think likewise which makes child rearing difficult.

Are parents conveying their love for their child sufficiently or there are communication problems which results in love not reaching to the child correctly.
When a mother communicates her love to the her child skillfully, the child will immediately change into a good child.

In the class, we were taught 3 ways to communicate our love to our child.
(1) Eight Second Hugging
(2) The Echo Method
(2) The 5 minute Suggestion Method

The 8 sec Hugging Method
When a child accomplish a task and has complied to what he is being told to do, give the child a big hug and whisper encouraging, thank you words.
Mummy or Daddy must make sure it is not just a little hug but continue to hold the child close for 8 secs. Most importantly, must love, respect them and believe in their ability.

The Echo Method
Mothers are often careful to speak frequently to their children but not vice-versa.
However it is very very important that parents listen to what their child has to say.
Many at times, parents forget to listen what the child has got to say and only wants the child to listen to what daddy or mummy has got to say which is very sad and disheartening for the child.

The 5 mins Suggestion Method
Follow the procedures:
a) First, talk to the child, "You're sleeping now. You can hear my voice".
b) Give your love by saying, "Daddy and Mummy loves you".
c) Enforce the bonding by saying, "Mummy's heart and your heart is always together".
d) Visualise your child as what you say, eg. "You're a genius. Your concentration is good. Your problems of spelling will go away. You will read and write well. You can see the flash cards. Mummy loves you. You can sleep well till the next morning".

The 5 mins Suggestion method has to be used continuously for 7-21 days or till the child is changing for the better.
Do not doubt its effect or complain about the child in the daytime.


During the class, there were some parents who were laughing and thinking how can all these be true or if they would work??!!
In my case, I feel that there is no harm trying and I have always believe in my child.
My little Princess does not have to be a doctor or a lawyer or even have the best grades in class. As long as she knows that her Daddy and Mummy loves her for just being her and that she grows to be a healthy and happy child. That is all that Daddy and Mummy hopes.

I fully understand the importance of a parent's love, encouragement, assurance, respect and belief it is to a child. All of us was once a child to our parents and looking back, isn't all these that was what we had seek and wanted from them?

I may not be the perfect parent but I love my child deeply, therefore I will make an effort to be there for my Princess.